Common Courtesy

Why do people have to stand so close to you in a line (or queue, as my British friends would say)? Is it a cultural issue? Why would it be a cultural thing? What is it about a culture that makes one want to stand within a small puff of bad breath stench away from my nostrils? Because it’s not a cultural thing. It’s a clueless thing. People who stand too close to you in a line are completely oblivious to common courtesy norms.

Bad Breath

Don’t Stand, Don’t Stand, Don’t Stand So Close to Me

It’s one thing to stand so effing close, but then you bump into me? “I was here first maam. Can you please back up 4 inches?” One bump is bad enough, ok, maybe it was an accident but even after I give you the stink eye, you bump into me again. And again!? How effing oblivious are you, standing so damn close that you’re hitting me with your shoulder bag over and over again? Have you ever heard of common courtesy?

You can tell by the look on my face, I’m obviously irked. Actually, I’m disgusted. You disgust me. I am disappointed with humanity right now. Has no one in your miserable life ever spoken to you about common courtesy and given you a bit of advice about not standing inside someone’s personal space? No? Well then I hope you’re reading this or maybe one of your friends will send this to you, if you even have any friends. I imagine if you ever had a friend, he/she would’ve offered you the suggestion, “If you can’t fit mice nuts between you and the person standing in front of you, you are standing too close”!

Revenge or a teaching moment?

So now I’m waiting to board my flight, lucky enough to be upgraded to first class and I’m first in line. The woman behind me is standing pretty close and inching her way up into my personal space. Delta lets people traveling with rug rats to board first so they start to board before First Class. Now it’s our turn to board. Clueless Woman is now standing right over my carry on bag, straddling it like she’s going to take a dump on it. Does she not see me? Am I invisible?

I purposely move very slowly and give the person boarding in front of me about 10 feet head start, just to mess with Clueless Woman and she is not happy. She looks like she’s about to have a nervous breakdown or anxiety attack. I am leaving way too much space in the line right now for her liking. This is my way to help humanity. I am trying to teach these people something about common courtesy. Just stand back a bit, out of the personal space of the person in front of you and you will be welcomed to Danny’s Nice Town.